The Bridge #39

Baby Futures

Hello

You're trying. You're feeling stuck...
You were searching for words, and it. Something was lost (or wasted? you feel) in the effort. It, shouldn't or wouldn't be. Yet it is!
 

You look back, and you see: You were trying. The feelings were fog. It was confusing. Yet in fact, the trying was more than enough.

Something has changed.

7 Things I (re)Learned Parenting a Newborn 8 Months, 2 Weeks, & a few days

(1) Babies are like little animals, and we all were babies once.
Maybe we still are (inside) a little bit.

(2) There's a lot they can't do, and they're not afraid to "ask for help" -- but not so helpless as we tend to think. When I have trouble moving my legs and am disoriented about night / day, new faces, and strange grumblings in my tummy -- I don't so easily slip into a smile and a giggle 5 minutes after the struggle is over.

(3) People hesitate to have a baby, sometimes because of unresolved childhood trauma, sometimes because of fear & anxiety about the future of our planet earth -- and those are legitimate hesitations. Sometimes though I'm feeling as though if we listen, then babies can help. It's a funny thing that, no?

(4) Sleep deprivation can cause all sorts of problems. It helps to have a network of support, so the parents can nap as much as the children.

(5) Babies want massages as much as adults do. Pats on the back and gentle caresses are forms of light-touch massage to ease the aches and pains of their belly, back, and other growing muscles. It helps their psychic-emotional state too.

(6) As a father, I gain so much from spending time together when she's in a good mood. Mornings after a nap, she is cheerful and curious. Feeling a relationship form between us helps me gain confidence when doing the more difficult things.

(7) Every couple of weeks, it feels like everything changes. Important to stay on your toes, nimble and ready to adapt. Regardless, babies will carry you along with them, as if life were a flowing stream.

Something Friendly

Thanks to friends this past week who welcomed us -- even with a crying baby -- and did fun activities with us in the mountains, making our winter vacation warm.

A Fun Thing

"We don't talk about Bruno" (Lin Manuel-Miranda)

A song from the Disney musical Encanto -- the song has also gone viral in its own right. I have listened to it countless times because my daughter saw the film (with her school), and it captures so well the central themes of the movie that I've decided to share it here.

Sometimes there are people in our lives (especially in our families) who are truth tellers, who see more clearly or who are more honest than usual. They reveal the cracks in our family stories, and we think (on instinct) that it's better to hide those cracks. Eventually, we are the ones who appear ridiculous.

Something Interesting

The Workforce is about to Change Dramatically (The Atlantic, Derek Thompson)

The 3 predictions in this article from 18 months ago are ones I have read several times. I like how the author talks about possible future trends, and then equally makes the case for those things not happening. Being able to talk about the future in an articulate way feels important.

The essay here might help you find the words to further your own thinking. Or maybe not.

He told me my fish would die, the next day, dead (no, no) /
He told me I’d grow a gut and just like he said (no, no) /
He said that all my hair would disappear, now, look at my head (no, no) /
Your fate is sealed when your prophecy is read /

Maybe your fate is just your fate,
and the prophecy is like putting on
eyeglasses to see more clearly?

JPC 😜