The Bridge #71
in which we dive a little deeper and explore a little wider, specifically - talking about purpose and my life history
Hello
Thank you for being here. Welcome, if it’s your first time.
Professional responsibilities are important, but sometimes they take up an over-sized importance in our imaginations and identities. I am more interested in cultivating a spirit of wholeness, a sense that my role as a friend — and a father and a husband and a son and a person belonging to and contributing to community — is most important.
What are you interested by?
Something to Consider
My career has been driven mostly by what I was interested in learning.
When I obsessed about books in middle school and high school, I became really good at math, a history nerd, a lover of stories, a person fascinated by psychology and… I was searching for something. I wanted to understand.
After leaving the academic track, with a Master’s in early medieval history to my name and three awesome roommates in NYC, I made a bet that maybe one day I’d come back to the “professor track” but in the meantime I’d learn about life beyond all that.
My career path became “non-linear.” & it’s continued that way: Moving from sector to sector, advancing in a manner not so obvious until we reveal what’s going on behind the scenes. My career path can even appear downright mysterious, if you look only at job titles.
Film Intern, Writing Tutor, Ops Coordinator, Tech Recruiter, Community Builder, UX Research Project Manager, Angel Investor, Career Coach, Teacher.
What the heck am I doing? Well, I didn’t always have the perfect clarity but I followed my intuition, and looking back I see a career portfolio that’s allowed me to explore how things work and then pass that accumulated knowledge on to others (rather than keeping it for my own advantage). I believe deeply in giving back, and the learning… it’s what gives my life purpose.
What have I been searching for? I have wanted to understand, as said above, how to cultivate healthy relationships with myself and others in a holistic way.
In this, I’ve been somewhat breaking a generational tendency… Because my father and his father before him have both been primarily concerned with building their business. The health of their families and friendships came second, unfortunately.
My great-grandfather, though, was someone I’ve learned had a portfolio career just like me. How he probably (I never met him) would have ranked his priorities: Being kind to others, Taking care of his family, Being a man of his community, and somewhere long after that (if the fates would allow) a respectable, easy-to-understand linear career.
As it turns out, my great-grandfather lived through a time of great economic uncertainty and immense social changes. We too are living through a time of seismic change. Perhaps then for us the “non-linear career” (the creatively-navigated career-well-balanced-with-the-rest-of-life) is rightfully become the respectable thing.
If you’ve ever sacrificed having “a linear career” for something going on in your life that felt more important, was it anything similar to what I’ve described? Was it different?
Something to Watch
Re-Writing Our Stories : “In the Nursing Home” by The On Being Project
Elizabeth Lokon is a person creating connection between aging seniors and younger adults via collaborative art.
In this submission to The On Being Project, she re-interprets a poem by Jane Kenyon called “In the Nursing Home.” The original poem speaks of the tightening, the fencing in, the limiting of what one can do, that happens when someone lives in a nursing home. It feels so sad, yet so true.
Elizabeth Lokon then adds a stanza to the poem, helping us see through to a solution: We can encourage intergenerational friendship. We can find for a horse, brought in from the hill pasture, a friend, & that friend will receive the opportunity to learn what the horse has seen, of what lies beyond. This is wisdom.
Something to Hear
When I hear this song, it inspires in me curiosity. Like, how can it be that we all can live such different stories and yet have commonalities?
The “father” in this song has a valuable message to give: He’s wanting to calm the restless energy in his son. He’s wanting his son to learn more things.
The “son” has a valuable point to make as well: Always listening, never being allowed to explain. He’s been trying to show how things are different now, it’s no use. He has to go away, do what he needs to do in another place.
Somehow, that describes pretty well the experience I’ve had with my own dad.
All the times that I've cried
(Stay, stay, stay)
Keeping all the things I knew inside
It's hard
But it's harder to ignore it
(Why must you go and make this decision alone)
If they were right, I'd agree
But it's them they know, not me
Now there's a way
And I know that I have to go away
I know, I have to go
Something to Say
Today I want to invite you to think of someone you can thank. When you’ve found the words, find a time to tell the person,
“Thank you.”
I would love to hear how that goes.
Til next time,
JPC 😎