The Bridge #93
in which we talk about our problems and find the right distance
Hello
& Welcome ! The Bridge is a newsletter connecting the professional and the personal creatively across cultures and a diversity of topics, until we are not only full of ideas but also ready to take action. Thanks for joining in the conversation.
A Thing to Get Us Thinking
Lately I’d been noticing how important it can be to take distance from something, whenever we feel something’s not quite right.
We might feel confused because we are too close to see the matter clearly, and taking distance helps us get a healthier point of view.
We might take distance because our balance is off. We have become so passionate, for instance, about our job that we’ve forgotten to take time for ourselves.
We might notice at a distance how important something really is for us, how it is connected to everything else, how our life goes less bright for the separation, and then we know how essential the element is to our life, and we can zoom back in knowing now what deeply matters.
Something to Enjoy
Andrew & Polly make a podcast called Ear Snacks that is for kids and parents to learn about stuff in a fun way. They also make music, and a recent album features songs of different genres giving words to some of the most profound experiences of childhood and parenting (and living, quite frankly — because to listen to music for children, when you are an adult, is to nourish the inner child, which has often been too long neglected).
Their opening number “Growing Up” has for instance a beautiful articulation of what it’s like for kids to be not yet understanding everything and still they can sing and dance and remind us what it was like, what it is like to be growing up, to be making it up as we go.
The song “I’ve Got a Problem” is a funny song about the moments when we sense we have a problem and we feel a lot of emotion. We’re not yet sure how to talk about it. To be invited to share more, we begin to find words and things become clearer… Friends who listen help us take the distance we need in order to feel better about the problems. It’s so simple and yet so helpful the reminder.
Ready to take a listen?
Something to Spark Conversation
Your Money or Your Life (book by Vicki Robin and Joe Dominguez)
Vicki Robin started her career as an actress but quickly grew disillusioned with the ways of the industry, and she traveled across America meeting people in an open-hearted genuine way, ready to learn. She met Joe Dominguez who had worked a relatively short career on Wall Street, and together they realized that with a relatively small nest egg and a simple life, they could avoid the need for a salaried job and “retire early” choosing their life priorities independent of “what pays.”
Their lived experience eventually led to a book and to various workshops, attempting to show the financial dependence we can fall into when we allow our identities to be consumed by consumerism and paid work, entrusting financial decisions to ‘experts’ instead of taking ownership of our own life.
What if we could take distance enough from money to know what it is we want it for, and begin to see with greater and greater clarity what truly would bring us fulfillment? What if we could measure our life energy with similar precision to how we measure the amount of money we have and need? Would we then know when it is we have enough?
This book helps the reader take real action to learn by experience the value of these questions. Do you dare take a look?
Something to Practice
Do you know on average what is your monthly budget? Do you look regularly at your expenses to know whether or not you’re spending where your values are?
Make space sometime soon to look closely at where you’re spending your money (and your time) so that you can verify it’s how you want to be spending your life.
Do you feel you can make the space in your life to do that?
Let’s try.
I’ve Got a Problem
(Tell us what your problem is)
It’s just hard to know where to start ‘cause it’s not just about me, it’s bigger than that.
I mean it’s such a big problem it makes me feel small.
…
I don’t want to sound like I’m complaining.
You don’t need to fix it I’m just saying,
I’ve Got a Problem
& I just want to shout about it!
AHHH! AHHH!
It’s a lot, it’s a lot, yeah…
If you want to talk about your problems, you know I’m a coach ?
Let’s talk about it: I’ll be right here.
JPC 😎